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6 Tips for Surviving the Holidays After Divorce

The holidays can be an especially difficult time if you are recently divorced. If you’re facing the holidays for the first time as a divorced person, try the following tips to brighten the season.

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Accept the invitations.

Resist the urge to sit home in your pajamas feeling sorry for yourself. Take every opportunity to have fun and socialize. If the party invitations aren’t pouring in, plan your own get-together.

Recharge.

Social gatherings are a great way to lift your spirits, but pampering yourself is also essential. Treat yourself to a massage or that new novel you’ve wanted to read. Do something that makes you happy, and don’t feel guilty for taking a little time for yourself.

Make goals.

The holiday season is definitely not the time to dwell on the negative. But with the New Year fast approaching, meaningful reflection and sincere resolve to improve yourself in specific areas can give you hope for a happier life in the next year.

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Create new traditions.

Undoubtedly, the holidays will conjure memories of your ex spouse, and the traditions you loved can make the season more painful for you and your children. Take the time to plan different activities and create new, positive experiences for everyone.

Coordinate with your ex well in advance.

If you have children, make sure you plan the holiday schedule early on so everyone knows what to count on. Where will the children spend Thanksgiving? Christmas Eve? Christmas Day? Are there any family gatherings planned? Working out the kinks as soon as possible will make the holidays more enjoyable for everyone involved. Be flexible. And above all, be civil.

Stay positive.

I know, it’s definitely easier said than done, but it is possible. Surround yourself with upbeat people and avoid those friends and family members who love to commiserate and complain. A positive attitude is especially important if you have children—like it or not, your mood will set the tone for their holiday, too.

Jessica Carter is a recently divorced mother of two. In her late thirties, she is learning to navigate the mysterious world of LDS mid-singles.
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