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This year I’ve had the opportunity to attend over 24 weddings and a handful of sealings. I’ve seen it all, classy and elegant, shabby-chic, country weddings, urban weddings, cultural-hall weddings, you name it. Through it all, I’ve had the chance to reflect on my on own singleness and my perspective and view about marriage and weddings.
Here are a few things I learned from all the weddings I attended this year.
When It comes to fast engagements, we can’t judge
Some things are done differently in Utah, I’m one of the first to admit that. Here in Utah, particularly with LDS couples, courtships are short and engagements even shorter. It is perfectly realistic for a couple to meet, date, court, and get engaged in as little as 4-6 weeks. There are, and have been many debates over whether this is appropriate or not, and I for one have had strong opinions on the subject. I have set firm guidelines for how long my relationships will last but I have seen several friends who have, on multiple occasions, expressed their disgust with other’s quick engagements. Ironically, some of those same friends have ended up with 6-week engagements. When questioned about it they just shake their heads and say, “It just feels right.”
I’ve learned that we can’t judge these couples. We’ve only had an outsider’s perspective on their relationship so it seems silly to pass judgement on how prepared they may or may not be for marriage. While it’s true that some are more ready than others, we haven’t felt what this couple has felt. We haven’t received the same impressions or been involved in the same private conversations. As much as I’d like to think I’m an expert on marriage and relationships, I’m not! So, if a crazy happy couple decides to tie the knot one month after their first date, by all means, I will be at the reception with a smile on my face and a present in my hand. Speaking of which…