Latter-day Saint Life

How the Church Strengthens Women, Especially When the Culture Can Overwhelm Us

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What a good reminder that fits perfectly with this quote from Sister Bonnie L. Oscarson: “May I point out something obvious? Life rarely goes exactly according to plan for anyone, and we are very aware that not all women are experiencing what the proclamation describes. It is still important to understand and teach the Lord’s pattern and strive for the realization of that pattern the best we can.” 

It may or may not shock you, but the gospel empowers women. For some women, they doubt this because it seems too difficult—some aren’t married, aren’t mothers, are raising kids alone, raising kids divorced, and some feel like failures in the process.

This post is meant to tackle some of the issues and pressures that we as women face in the Church. Some of the pressure we feel stems from trying to live the gospel, but most of it comes from the culture of its members.

You'll also like: Is There a Mormon Burnout Epidemic? (+ How to Cure It)

As you read, I encourage you to study the materials mentioned here to recognize that as a woman you are strong, intelligent, beautiful and loved. As a daughter of God and a Latter-day Saint, you are a force to be reckoned with—a force for good.

The Burden of High Expectations

A lot of pressure that women face in the Church revolves around the “ideal” woman checklist. It probably looks something like this:

  • Be a faithful member of the church
  • Regularly attend the temple
  • Get married in the temple
  • Have beautiful, well-behaved children
  • See that said children are also married in the temple and have beautiful, well-behaved children
  • Be faithful and supportive to your spouse
  • Be fit
  • Consistently eat healthily and quickly lose any pregnancy weight
  • Maintain an orderly household
  • Always maintains a modest, tasteful appearance
  • Be talented and share those talents with others
  • Serve a mission—either in early 20s or with your spouse
  • You must be happy—always happy
Images from She Traveled.

If the demands of the day-to-day leave you feeling overworked, overwhelmed, and exhausted, you may be suffering from an all-too-common malady prevalent among Mormon women: emotional burnout. With such perceived cultural pressure to “do it all,” how can a woman balance the desire to serve others with caring for her own personal needs?

As a wife, mother, clinical counselor, and musician, author Julie de Azevedo Hanks understands better than most the demands placed on women in the Church, and she has spent years providing clinical counseling to Latter-day Saint women and families.The Burnout Cure dispels common cultural myths that often leave women feeling “never good enough.” Through scriptural quotes, personal stories, and clinical examples, Hanks offers a bevy of tools designed to help sisters identify and meet their emotional needs, to accept their limitations, to let go of the guilt and perfectionism, and to lean on the Lord.

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