Don’t Rush Romance or Timing
Life is a series of perpetual and consistent change. Very few times, if ever, can we predict everything that will happen the next day, yet alone the next year or decade. Because of this, we should relax and try to enjoy the bumps and adventures together. Each relationship will develop in its own way and on its own timetable—and we should be happy for that.
When he was president of BYU, Elder Holland and his wife addressed the students about this need for patience with the timing of life.
“Pat: For all of the rest of you out there, women and men, we really believe romance and marriage, if they are going to come, will come a lot more naturally if you worry about them a lot less. By the same token we also know that is easy to say and hard to do. It’s hard because so much of our young life in the Church is measured on a precise time sequence. We are baptized at eight. At twelve the young men are ordained deacons and the young women enter Mutual. Then we date at sixteen, graduate from high school at eighteen, and go on missions at nineteen or twenty-one.
Jeff: But then, suddenly, it is less and less structured, less and less certain. . . . I don’t know whether this is our first piece of counsel or our last, but in any case, don’t rush things needlessly and unnaturally. Nature has its rhythms and its harmonies. We would do well to fit ourselves as best we can with those cycles rather than frantically throwing ourselves against them. As suggested a moment ago, I know that for some of you “rushing things” is not the problem. For the group whose progress is being measured in glacial centimeters, forget this part of the message. But for the rest of you, be calm, be patient, be happy with the season you are in” (Jeffrey R. Holland & Patricia T. Holland, “Some Things We Have Learned Together”).