{LDSL Blog} To Mormons: What's Mine Is Yours . . . Sometimes

I love this article. It's always interesting hearing other people's opinions and experiences. Personally I don't like lending things out. I'm LDS and I find it a bit worrying that because so many people in church are happy to lend their right arm, the rest of us are expected to do the same. I offered to lend my camera to a friend who went on holiday to Canada and he quite rightly turned me down saying that if he broke it, he'd have to pay to replace it and that would cost him and it might annoy me not to have the camera that I wanted and it wasn't worth the trouble it might bring to our friendship. That was a good point and I've never forgotten it, now I don't lend anything. Like the writer points out, many things get returned (if you're lucky) and it's scratched, broken etc... I've never needed to ask to borrow anything, I think it's just plain rude.

I think it's fine to borrow things as long as you return them in the condition you received it in, or better. I think what's rude is not returning things in a timely manner, not returning them at all, or breaking them and not replacing them. I guess I've had that happen a few too many times, because now I make sure to only lend things that, if they ended up broken and the person didn't have the decency to replace them, I wouldn't miss them that much.

I love your article Chrisy. YOu are very refreshing Thank you for sharing your expericences. I just moved to Utah county. I grew up a minority Mormon in IL. Chrisy, thank you for understanding that no body is perfecteven in Mayberry. I can very much relate to the feeling "I better puff my hair before I answer the door." I am still working on the "what you see is what you get" princeple. Anyway I want to communicate about what I feel about sharing my religion with others. My religion has saved my life every since I was a kid. When I want to share that with some one it is because I want them to have the same joy that I have felt. There is no other way for me to describe it. I don't share this precious part of me, my religion, because of duty or because I was told to. I share it because The Church of Jesus Christ of latter day Saints has brought me joy. I want others to have and feel that unexplanable joy in their lives. Chrisy it sounds like you are the recipient of a lot of love and I am glad you except the sharing of religion as an act of love. So when I see you and I say "will you be baptized?" it is because I am feeling love for you. You can answer however you want and I will still be your friend and love you. To have this understanding is the beginning of a wonderful friendship amoung people of different religions. This is how I feel. Your're awesome Crisy!

I was very interested in reading your blog and getting someone elses point of view - member or not - as I have never had a problem lending anything but now I tend not to so much because of the number of times my items have been either lost, stolen (yes, really!) or broken - usually without even an apology.

I'm sorry to disagree with several of the comments above. The Saviour suggested, even commanded, that we should pray for those who despitefully use us. Ungrateful borrowers would fall into this category. He also said that if a man takes your coat, offer him your cloak as well. That would suggest that just because a bad borrower burned you, you don't avoid lending ever again. I have many faults, but being a bad borrower is not among them. I rarely ask to borrow, but if I'm in a pickle I will ask a friend, because I know that I will show my gratitude by returning the item promptly and in much better condition than I received it. Several years ago, a few days before our family was scheduled to tow our boat about 700 miles to meet my sister's family at a lake, my son totalled our truck, which was the only vehicle capable of towing the boat. I tried to find a rental that could tow, but found out that rental companies don't want you to tow things with their trucks and therefore don't install tow packages on them. So in desperation, I called a good friend who owned a diesel truck and he graciously lent it to me, and I then put over 1500 hard miles on his vehicle. So what did I do in return? I returned it with a full oil change, a full in and out detail cleaning package; I also repaired a hole in his bed cover and touched up dozens of rock chips in the paint. And of course the tank was completely full. If the truck had needed anything else I would have done it, and my friend was so grateful that both he and his wife called to thank me, saying that they had lent it out several times before and never had anything close to this type of "thank you" in return. I say this not to boast, but to suggest to anyone reading this that, with the right attitude and approach, it is possible to be a good lender and a good borrower, and that Christ would expect as much.

I loved this article! I am not a member, but grew up with many LDS friends, and even attended Ricks in college with some of them. I was always astonished at their generosity too. My room mate and I actually stayed at someone else's parents house in SLC one night, on our way to or from somewhere...and we'd never met them before but they just opened up their home to us. Two college students! Crazy! And? I'd totally take you up on the caravan to Mexico hook up! Ha!

...there are so many in need. You can only give without any reservation until you literally have nothing more to give. If at any point, when do you preserve that which you require to help many as opposed to only a few? Even a bishop cannot give and give to every person in need without requiring some effort from the recipient. In addition to material belongings, I believe we ought to also leave people a bit better than we found them. Could we help an ungrateful borrower to become a grateful borrower? The Lord is willing to give us numerous, even countless, 'chances.' But even He requires effort on our part. I feel it's quite alright to give some thought to what is being asked of us. We ought to lend generously, but do we not also have the right to decline lending an item that we suspect may not be returned when a) we know that others would benefit from being able to borrow it and b) when the ungrateful borrower won't be any better off for having borrowed it and not returned it?