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Saving Your Marriage

July 06, 2012
source: LDS.org

MR says: This Mormon Message made both my husband and me tear up a little. It's a good one.

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Comments 3 comments

comanche said...

06:52 PM
on Jul 07, 2012

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Sometimes one person in a marriage does not take marriage covenants seriously and certainly does not view the marriage as God-like. A temple marriage is not a free ticket to the eternities. This message made me ill as I am currently dealing with a probable divorce in my own marriage because my husband seems to believe I am his property and he can look at pornography and expect me to stay with him forever. He believes he is entitled to my companionship. "I have the eternities to get this right." Maybe in 20 to 30 years he would finally get over his problems, but I am not willing to continue dying inside for all those years and have my own son have that as an example of "love." Sometimes divorce has to be contemplated for the lives of those who are not the offenders and are seeking for a righteous, healthy and happy life. Most of these messages I find to be very uplifting. This one was not. There are way too many women killing themselves because they are being told to stay with men who abuse and misuse them. Some are even being treated as if they are the ones not taking the marriage seriously or are breaking the temple covenants. I will not continue to nurse my husband at the cost of my own and my son's life. I can forgive someone without continually putting myself in the line of fire. If true repentance was happening then maybe things would be different, but even then, you are taking a risk to be blown to bits again. Not just yourself, but your children as well. Emotional abuse IS abuse and pornography IS adultery. I think this message could at least include some quote from a prophet or apostle about how divorce is okay in some circumstances. I have felt God guiding me through this process as I have prayerfully fasted, prayed, and attended the temple and He has never told me to stay married no matter the cost. The marriage covenant does not include shackles.

ifgalaxy03 said...

08:45 AM
on Jul 08, 2012

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I so agree with you Comanche; we ALL are commanded to forgive but continuing to forgive those who do not truly repent turn the forgiver into an enabler of the offender and the ofense. Our Heavenly Father has showed love and patience to those who have committed sin. He sent Prophets to warned them or their upcoming destruction if they did not repent of their evil ways. I believe in the sacred convenants of MARRIAGE and honesty, forgiveness, and believe in given people a second chance, but I also believe that honesty, self respect and self preservation are of the utmost importance. Spouses should not be "called" to sacrifice ourself for the sakes of a partner who is unwilling to keep his/her marriage convenant. We came to this earth to grow and we will not be able to go to the celestial kingdom with a partner that has not repented or sought help to give up whatever is that is causing his/her to be an unbeliever. I believe that when a loving daughter of GOD contemplates ending her "eternal marriage" she should have exhausted all attempts to "save it" but if all attempts fail; she should not be judged or be asked to endure such degradation. It takes a lot of guts and a real woman to be able to make such a DIFFICULT decision. I will be praying for you; remember that his behavior is not YOUR fault. If your husband has decided to let the "enemy" into his heart. PRAY for him. Pray that he may be able to endure the lies and the darts of addiction; that if he truly loves YOU and YOUR SON he will let our Savior back into his HEART. My heart IS DEEPLY TROUBLED and SAD for your circumstances. Your family will be in my prayers.

comanche said...

02:33 PM
on Jul 22, 2012

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@ifgalaxy03, I am humbled and touched by a complete stranger's willingness to pray for me. Thank you.
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