If you are "as the army of Helium" or if you're a child of God with "parents kind of weird," you might have misheard a hymn lyric. Check out our list of these and other hilariously mistaken hymn lyrics.
In most cases, the contents of Church songs are no laughing matter, but... did someone just sing about a badger and a squirrel? And I swear I heard "carrots" mentioned in the rest hymn. If you've ever heard something not quite right about a hymn's lyrics, you're not alone. Some of these funny mis-hearings come from kids and some are from adults, but they're all pretty darn funny:
Come, come ye saints! No toilet paper here!
From Come, Come Ye Saints
Put your shoulder to the wheel, push along. If the wheel goes in reverse, you won't live long!
From Put Your Shoulder to the Wheel
High on the mountain top, a badger ate a squirrel.
From High on a Mountain Top
My Country 'tis of thee sweet land of liberty, a flea I see.
From My Country 'tis of Thee
We thank thee, oh God, for a profit.
Sometimes called "the businessman's hymn"
From We Thank Thee, O God, for a Prophet
How late thou art!
From How Great Thou Art!
How great cows are!
From How Great Thou Art!
In our culture, food is everywhere--at ward potlucks, after firesides, and at nearly every Church activity. So the question arises: is food the Mormon vice?
My name’s Jenny. I’m a Mormon. And I’m a chocoholic.
Let me tell you a story. From ages 11 to 22, I could have been classified as overweight. To be fair, I’m rather tall, so a lot of people never thought of me that way, but it was still true. And I can tell you right now why I was overweight: I love food! It’s still a love that I can’t resist. Basically I know that I will always have at least two things in my life: the gospel and a sweet-tooth.
But lately I’ve been pondering about my love of food—and I realized I’m not the only person out there who struggles with this. For some people, food is no big deal. For others (like me), it’s the biggest trial of their life. We Mormons are no different. We’re commanded to live the Word of Wisdom, and the commandment is pretty black and white about some things. No alcohol. No coffee. No tobacco. No tea. But it’s not completely black and white on everything. For example, there’s no specific part of the 89th section of the Doctrine and Covenants that tells me I can’t eat an entire pan of brownies. So is it ok if I do? (I confess nothing…)
If we have such good direction from the Lord on what we should put into our bodies, why does food often seem to be the vice for many of us Mormons? (Myself included.) It’s a question I really am curious about. Of course I don’t have the perfect answer, but I have a few theories:
Happy Pioneer Day! No matter where you live, you can celebrate the pioneers' sacrifice by learning more about them. Start out with this quiz! Click through the pages to find out the answer to each question!
Which famous outdoorsman did Brigham Young get a few tips from?
Puns don't normally need a lot of attention, because a good pun is its own re-word (ha!). But these hilariously groan-worthy LDS and scriptural puns simply have to be shared. They're sure to leave you laughing!
Last week, we asked fans of our Facebook page to share their favorite LDS puns. From Knee-fights to lemonites and everywhere in between, these LDS puns are so bad--you might just call them puns of perdition--that you'll find yourself chuckling at how hilariously awful they are.
What do you call an alligator in a vest? An in-vest-igator!
King Lamoni thought Ammon was a rather disarming fellow.
It's no wonder none of the 2000 stripling warriors weren't hurt; they had Heal-a-man as their leader.
What is a vampire's least favorite church meeting? Stake conference.