Latter-day Saint Life

5 Signs They Are the Right One for You

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“You have always given me wings to fly, and I have loved you for it.” -Marjorie Pay Hinckley to President Gordon B. Hinckley.

When you are dating someone often you start to wonder, could this be the one? Everyone has a list either written or unwritten. However, we should have realistic expectations and realize that we marry potential and not perfection. So how do you know if they are the right one? Here are five signs that they are the right one for you!

1. They put in effort.

If marriage is meant to be a two-way partnership, then dating needs to be a two-way road as well. If you find yourself in a relationship where you are putting in all, or almost all, of the effort, it is a red flag that the other person is either not right or not ready.

One of the best pieces of dating advice I have ever been given was by my sister Paige. I was chasing a girl that I liked and Paige asked me, “Does this girl put in any effort?” She then continued, “When you find the right girl, she will put in as much effort to making it work as you do. If she is not putting in the effort, she is not the one.” I did not want to hear that because this girl was not putting in any effort. Eventually, the relationship fizzled out and I realized Paige was right. For a relationship to last, both people must be fully invested.

When you find the right one they will recognize that you are worth the effort. You will both sacrifice and both be willing to pay any price to be together. When you find the person that you are willing to do that for and who is willing to do it for you, then you’ve found the one.

“Just as harmony comes from an orchestra only when its members make a concerted effort, so harmony in marriage also requires a concerted effort.”
President Russell M. Nelson


Want more dating advice to help you build a celestial marriage?

The eternal significance of the questions of how to find—and become—a great marriage partner can feel overwhelming. With humor and warmth, LDS family therapist and BYU Marriage Preparation Teacher Dr. Mark Ogletree presents principles of marriage preparation that address the questions and concerns of today's young single adults in this incredible resource, Preparing for Your Celestial Marriage.


2. They put God first, but put you second.

This one is huge. Most people think that they need to put their spouse first, but God really needs to be number one. This will ground them to their core principles of honesty, faith, sacrifice, forgiveness, and most of all their commitment to keeping their promises. You not only need to find someone who puts God first, but will not begrudge you for putting God ahead of them. In all things, our covenants to God must come first. Ask yourself, if I was to die, would they raise my family in the faith? A big secret in successful marriages is something called the marriage triangle, God is at the top and husband and wife are at the bottom corners. As a husband and wife draw closer to God they actually draw closer to their spouse. Happy couples put God first.

After God, your spouse should be a solid #2. No one and nothing else, other than God, should come before your spouse. 

Lead image from My Life by Gogogoff
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