Letter from a Wife of a Pornography Addict: To My Relief Society President

To My Relief Society President, This is a very hard letter for me to write. The desire and need to confide in you has been bouncing around in my head for a while and I can’t ignore it any longer. This has been a trying year for me. Actually, it has been one of the hardest of my life and yet also the most spiritual and comforting. I found out at the beginning of this year that my husband has struggled with an addiction to pornography since he was a teenager. There were long periods of sobriety, sometimes years long and many bishops and feelings of “I’ve got this.” He would continually follow his priesthood leader’s guidance to “study your scriptures more, pray more and attend the temple more,” in an effort to conquer this trial. He first told me about his “problem” a year or two into our marriage, but it wasn’t until earlier this year that we recognized this “problem” as an actual addiction – not because of the intensity and escalations [a common symptom of addiction], but rather due to the cycles [unhealthy, repeated patterns can also be symptoms of addiction]. Once we started treating it as an addiction, or an illness, then we both began to heal and recover.

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