In family, from the get-go memories are being made. I’ve been with Lizzie when each of our five children were born. My theory that girls are much more expensive to raise than boys was verified when I noticed that my boys came out of the womb with their little hands clinched into a fist. To me, that was symbolic of the challenges that boys have to face in life. But when my girls came out of the womb their little hands were cupped just wide enough for an American Express card to fit in it. My “pet peeve” while the children were tiny, was changing a wet diaper and as soon as I’d finished, they’d wet again. Lizzie was so patient when they did that. She’d just pinch their little cheeks and say, “you little rascal you.” I, on the other hand was terrible, I admit it. When they would wet after I’d changed their diaper I’d say, “Hey man, you had your chance!”
They were so cute in those early years, but eventually they became possessed with a teenage spirit. This spirit took control of their once sweet, little bodies and personalities. When a daughter became irritated at me, the possession would cause her to put the tip of her tongue to the roof of her mouth, and then click her tongue while expelling air in an irritated manner. Then she would roll her eyes to the back of her head and immediately fold her arms defiantly while shaking her head as if she had the palsy. My boys became possessed with a “messy” spirit. I couldn’t believe their bedroom! Do you know how you can tell if the room you walk into is a teenage boy's bedroom? There’s fruit flies hovering over the waste paper basket and the hamster’s trying to escape to cleaner air! My trying to correct them just got me into trouble with them. We used to have two magnet signs that hung on our olive green refrigerator back in those possessed, teenage years that summed it up. One read: “When Momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” The other read: “When Daddy ain’t happy, ain’t nobody cares!”
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