On Halloween, we posted a few pictures on Twitter and Facebook featuring a few things Mormons find far more terrifying than monsters, goblins, and ghouls:
The scariest Mormon things we could imagine. What else ya got? #HappyHalloweenpic.twitter.com/Rk0OwNdS90 — LDS Living (@LDSLivingMag) October 31, 2017
But, it turns out, our readers came up with quite a few LDS terrors we had overlooked. Here are just a few of the hilariously relatable things Mormons find frightening:
When daylight savings and fast Sunday happen to land on the same day.
When you run out of goldfish crackers while subbing in the nursery.
When the Cub Scouts finally earn their pocketknives, and now you have a herd of 8-year-old boys running around with sharp weapons.
When you have to give a talk or teach a lesson while a general authority is watching.
When your stripping toddler makes a break for the stand during sacrament meeting.
When you have to ask someone to dance at your very first stake dance.
When the executive secretary's number pops up on your caller ID.
When your ward is in charge of snow removal for all of January.
When you learn that you have to teach the gospel doctrine class on the Isaiah chapters.
When you accidentally sleep in the day you have to give a talk in sacrament meeting.
When you learn all the neighbors on your street are representatives for Essential Oils, LipSense, and LuLaRoe.
When your Deacon's quorum shows up for the scout campout with 10 boxes of Twinkies but no fresh underwear or sleeping bags.
When you've driven two hours to get to your niece's wedding and remember your temple recommend is still at home sitting on the counter.
When you are in charge of finding people to clean the meetinghouse every single week.
When you are asked to be a Ma or Pa for your next stake trek.
When someone shows up to the ward potluck with vegetables in the Jell-O salad.
When someone asks you to comment in Sunday School but you weren't exactly paying attention.
And if those thoughts weren't enough, here are just a few horrifying true stories our readers shared with us:
"We were having a small RS meeting in my Sunnyvale ward years ago, and a middle-aged woman was trying to come around the back of all those sitting. There were huge stacks of folding chairs just a few feet from the back seats against the wall in the room. She tripped on the foot of one, and the whole pile slid down and made her fall. When she got up, she was so cute and handled it well by making us all laugh when she said, 'I've just got to quit drinking!'" —Jacquelyn Meyers "My husband was crying during his sacrament talk. He didn’t know he had 3” inches of SNOT dangling and swinging from his nose. The first 10 rows of people are still in counseling! Our family was so embarrassed!" —Amy Taylor Watson