Every month or two, a group of friends in Bountiful, Utah, gathers for dinner. The location, food, and activities vary, but their commitment to showing up has never wavered—they haven’t missed coming together for a regular dinner group in over 50 years.
Here are five lessons they’ve learned after sharing more than 600 meals together.
1. Invitations Are Powerful
In 1975, Nancy Gould and her family moved to a new ward in Bountiful, Utah. Nancy didn’t know many of her neighbors, but she heard that several families in the congregation had dinner groups.
Soon, she was called to serve in the Primary with a neighbor. Although the two didn’t know each other well, they decided to create their own dinner group and include a few other families who were new to the ward.
The families clicked almost immediately, connecting over shared values, milestones, and interests. The group started meeting once a month, eventually including a total of 10 couples and their children.
“We’re not like an open house where you come in, stand around, visit, and then leave,” explains Margie Bradford, whose family joined the group in 1976. “We’re there for the evening to visit together. We come from a variety of backgrounds, a variety of wonderful stories.”
2. The Secret to Consistency
The dinner group’s solution to staying consistent is refreshingly straightforward: Keep a schedule. Nancy and Margie say their calendar has been successful because it involves:
- Planning long term. The group uses a shared written calendar, currently scheduling it in four-year blocks. Nancy says that without a plan, well-intentioned groups can easily fizzle out. “If you don’t have a calendar that says it’s your turn, it’s easy to forget.”
- Using a predictable rotation. The group usually holds the dinners on Friday nights. While the months are assigned years in advance, the actual dates are open-ended.
- Switching seasons. To keep things fair, Margie rotates the hosting assignments throughout the seasons. “So, for instance, if you started out hosting, say, in January, the next year it would move up three months to March or April,” she explains. “Then, you’d move up to summer, then you’d move to fall.”
- Setting the next dinner immediately. Before families leave the current dinner, the upcoming host sets the exact date for the next gathering.
- Building in backup plans. If the assigned family can’t host, then it’s up to them to switch with someone else in the group. “That kept us going,” Margie says, “because it was never [a question of] ‘Well, who’s going to do it next month?’”
- Sharing the load. The host prepares the main course, while the other families bring side dishes, appetizers, drinks, or desserts.
Regardless of how you choose to plan your own gatherings, Margie says she believes that what ultimately counts is intentional effort. “I think it’s important, if it’s a family or a dinner group like this, that you’re willing to spend the time and the little bit of money to gather. We plan events because that connection is what brings us such great joy.”
3. Christlike Support Is Sustaining
Through marriages, births, life-altering illnesses, and funerals, the group has provided a safe space to process grief.
Of the original 20 members, 12 have passed away. One of the men even requested that members of the dinner group serve as pallbearers at his funeral. “Every time someone dies, it’s like losing a brother or sister,” Nancy says.
Today, the eight remaining members hold a dinner group every other month, gathering in their homes and the assisted living facility where one member resides.
“I don’t feel lonely, even though it’s just my husband and me that live in our home,” Margie says. “I know I have this dinner group to look forward to.”
4. Friendships Can Be Eternal
As the dinner group has nurtured their friendships, they’ve always encouraged one another along the covenant path. “Everything we did was fun, but we also had good discussions about the Lord and what we believed in,” Nancy says.
“I think friendships are eternal,” Margie says. “This life is a wonderful way to continue friendships through the eternities.”
The friends have sustained one another in their many callings, from Young Women presidencies and bishoprics to temple shifts and mission calls. When Margie and her husband served as mission leaders in Chicago from 1997 to 2000, they continued to stay in touch with the dinner group by sending monthly letters.
Margie says that the dinner group strengthened the friends’ testimonies and even family relationships, allowing them to stay accountable and motivate each other in their goals.
“The thing that amazes me is we have all stayed active in the Church,” Margie explains. “Nobody’s gotten divorced. The furthest somebody moved away was Farmington, a neighboring city. But they still came to dinners and still kept in touch.”
5. Anyone Can Build Relationships
For those who are seeking a greater sense of community in their lives, both Nancy and Margie suggest reaching out to people with similar interests and values.
Referencing counsel from former Young Women General President Ardet G. Kapp, Margie recommends reflecting on your driving purpose before making plans: “Do not ask, ‘What are you going to do?’ Ask, ‘What do you want to have happen?’ When you start with that, then you say, ‘OK, how are we going to make this happen?’”
Once that vision is in place, Margie says all it takes is stepping outside of yourself and inviting others to participate:
“Someone’s got to take that first step. Sometimes, we don’t want to take the time to be in charge of something that we think might be hard to do, but it really is simple. It just takes someone who’s committed.”
Editor’s note: This article first appeared in the July/August 2026 issue of LDS Living magazine.
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