Latter-day Saint Life

Emily Belle Freeman: Finding Christ No Matter Where You Are or How You Feel

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Everyone has a story, a need, a lack, a place of inadequacy. I know the details of mine, and you know the details of yours. And the Lord? He knows about every story, and every dark place, and every hope and heartache and happily ever after.

He sees all of them.

Perhaps He sees you trying to follow your dreams and live your best life, how you want to make a difference. He knows the desires of your heart and the imaginations of your thoughts and how you wonder if you have what it takes to succeed. His grace has the power to lift and enable you.

Maybe He sees you caving to the worry that presses in, how it wakes you, heart pounding, in the night. He knows the inner turmoil, the uneasiness, the tension that sometimes forces you to disengage, to seek solitude, to long for the peace that never comes. His grace has the power to calm and strengthen you.

He sees you waking at the break of the day to start the routine again, the feeding, the changing, the never living your own life because you are completely invested in theirs. He sees how the caregiving, the sacrifice, the serving require you to burn the midnight oil. Hands that are worn, eyes that are heavy, He sees this. His grace has the power to fill your reserves.

He sees you struggling through the addiction that chases you, that whispers to you in your idle moments, that won’t loose its hold on you. How you try to be strong, how you sometimes succumb. His grace has the power to intensify and reinforce your fight.

He sees you battling memories that try to destroy you, that haunt your thoughts in the midnight hours, the traumas that won’t be forgotten. He knows they have a hold over you, over your happiness, how you feel like a hostage to the past. His grace has the power to shift your focus forward so you can leave that past behind.

He sees you aching from the loss, how you mourn the memories you’ll never make together, the life moments they will never see, the parts of the journey they will never know. His grace has the power to bring the healing balm of Gilead for the wounds that feel too deep.

He sees you trying to mend the rift, to understand the enlarging gap, sees you wondering how they can walk away so easily, how they don’t seem to care, how their choices are breaking your family, your heart, how this is breaking you. His grace has the power to enlarge your capacity for patience, for understanding, for love.

He sees you longing for what will complete you and fearing it will never come. How you yearn for love, for companionship, to find security. How you are still walking the journey alone. His grace has the power to encircle you with love, with confidence, with peace.

He sees you trying to overcome the hurt, to let go of the injustice, to rid your soul of that which embitters you. He sees how every day you try to forgive that which seems unforgiveable. How you want to trust, to love, to believe that you have worth. His grace has the power to help you release and let go of what has been broken in you so you can begin to live again.

He sees you embarking on a journey driven by faith, but with a hint of fear. How you are entering into something unexpected that has the potential for so much good in your life, but how it will require more sacrifice than you have ever given before. His grace has the power to empower you, increase your capacity, and illuminate your view.

He sees you.

“However late you think you are, however many chances you think you have missed, however many mistakes you feel you have made or talents you think you don’t have, or however far from home and family and God you feel you have traveled, I testify that you have not traveled beyond the reach of divine love. It is not possible for you to sink lower than the infinite light of Christ’s Atonement shines” (Jeffrey R. Holland, “The Laborers in the Vineyard,” Ensign, May 2012).

My friend Kris would tell you that He sees you even if you don’t see Him. He can fill your hungry soul. He can help you to discover joy. He will meet you in your emptiness, your wandering, your dark places, there in your aching, and He will bring grace even if you don’t know how it’s done. You don’t have to have a complete understanding for His grace to begin its work in you. The Lord will meet us in our ordinary places.

Just look for Him where you already are.

Lead image: Shutterstock

Grace Where You Are is filled with inspired scripture, gentle moments of reflection and meditation, and opportunities for personal application. Spending some time in its pages will help you to recognize that no matter where you are in your life's journey, Christ will come to you when you feel you fall short, extending His divine grace and providing so much more than what you lack. Available now at DeseretBook.com.

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